LIVE.AND.DIE

NOTICE TO CUSTOMERS

It is the year 2038. Feelings are manufactured, licensed and sold by the unit. Memories are forged to order and shipped in kits. LIVE.AND.DIE PRODUCTIONS is a licensed retailer of feelings, memories and related consumables serving Region 5. This portal lists current surplus stock, audio feelings in inventory, hard-copy ordering, manufacturing standards, recall notices and terms of service. All prices in United States dollars. Taxes calculated at checkout. All sales are final.

The stock listed below was recovered from a single account. The account holder is not named. He spends his days in a rented room with the blinds down, a desktop built from parts, a phone with a cracked screen, nine unsold prints in a tube, two sheets of something, a bottle of something else, cold fries, a cassette with the tape pulled out, a television that only gets channel 2, a web show from 2007 playing at half speed on a laptop that will not close, and the feeling, which is not for sale, of having been a child once in a country that sold it back to him at retail. The company has acquired everything else. It is offered here at a discount.

Customers are advised that the portal degrades with use and that the company does not repair it. A representative will be with you shortly.

Ten units, all 2026, all recovered from the account described above. Click any unit to inspect it at full size. Units are displayed in four tones of red per STD-01; the colour originals are shown on the Instagram at no charge. The video units are short loops cut from the full pieces. Hard copies of any unit are available through the order form. Feelings pictured are not included.

Catalogue

Condition "crushed" indicates a unit manufactured to STD-01 with no midtones present. Condition "moshed" indicates a unit in which the source footage has been allowed to decay in accordance with STD-02. Units are sold as-is. Units are not guaranteed to produce a feeling. Units that produce a feeling are not guaranteed to produce the same feeling twice. Pictured feelings are a serving suggestion.

Audio units in inventory. Noise, industrial, IDM, vapornoise. Manufactured to STD-04: the reference material is sampled, slowed, crushed and returned to the customer with the middle removed. Audio units are delivered through authorized dealers only.

Audio feelings are licensed, not sold. The license is non-transferable and terminates on the customer's death, or on the death of the feeling, whichever comes first. Streaming links replace the dealer links when the distributor clears them. The distributor has not cleared them. The distributor has not cleared anything since 2011.

Hard copies are the only physical product sold through this portal. There is no cart and no checkout. Click a unit below and an order line is copied to your clipboard. Paste it into a DM to the Instagram dealer. A representative will reply with payment details.

• 12 × 12 inch hard copy, matte stock, signed on the back. Open edition. $25 plus shipping.
• Any unit in surplus stock, including stills from the video units, can be printed at the same size and price. State the SKU.
• Larger sizes (18 × 18, 24 × 24) on request.
• Digital files are not sold. Feelings are not sold here. Feelings are sold everywhere else.

Please note: hard copies are printed from the colour originals, not the red versions shown on this portal. A red version can be made on request. Ships rolled, in a tube, within the United States; elsewhere on request.

Order lines are copied to the clipboard only; this portal does not transmit anything. By pasting an order line you agree to the Terms of Service in their entirety, including §5 (Children) and §9 (Severability). Shipping estimates are estimates. Delivery is not guaranteed in the event of recall, weather, war, or the customer no longer wanting it, which is the most common event.

All units are manufactured to the following standards. Units failing any standard are destroyed, or sold at a discount.

Is any of this generated? No. Every unit is made by hand from tape, scans and photographs, in editing software. The portal itself was built with the assistance of a machine, which is a different department.

Why is everything red? Red is the one colour that survives STD-01. Full-colour units are shown on the Instagram at no charge.

Can I use a unit? For a flyer, a mix cover, a wall or a tattoo: ask by DM, and the answer is usually yes, with credit. For anything that makes money: ask, and the answer is a conversation. For training a model: no.

Can I return a feeling? No. See Terms, §2.

I purchased a childhood in 2004 and it has stopped working. See Recall Notices. Do not return it. Keep it where it is. Do not attempt repair.

Where is the about page? Who runs this? There is no about page. There is stock, standards, terms, recalls and a DM button. The account holder is not named. See Notice to Customers.

Why does the portal keep breaking? See Notice to Customers, final paragraph.

Will there be more stock? Yes. Stock is replenished as the account holder produces it.

How do I reach a representative? A representative will be with you shortly.

NOW HIRING

LINE WORKER — FEELINGS DIVISION — $14.50/HR

Must stand 12 hours. Must lift 50 lbs. Must be a person (negotiable). No experience necessary. No experience possible. Benefits after 90 days. There are no benefits. Apply within.

The company is an equal opportunity employer. Opportunity is equal to zero for all applicants.